Learning to Be Tolerant

Generally, when we think of being tolerant, our minds go to those who are not within the Body of Christ--or maybe, to the difficult relationships in our lives, the people who constantly rub us the wrong way, and just get our last nerve. This week however, into our full 2nd week of consecration, our prayer focus (at my church) is personal--to have greater understanding, patience and compassion. I really need this week.
While I don't struggle much with understanding, because it is something I constantly ask God for--it is a regular prayer of mine, I do have issues with patience and compassion. I will ask for even more understanding--which (ironically) sometimes leads to my problem of lack of patience. Once you gain an understanding of spiritual things, and God removes the scales from your eyes, its tough to remember what it was like before that understanding came.
There are some things that I see in Scripture, rather clearly and plainly, and I expect others to see them with the same clarity and plainness, but that isn't fair; because until they were revealed to me, I was stubborn, dogmatic and unyielding and refused to even consider that my way of thinking might just be errant. In fact, on at least one issue, I refused to even dig deeper and study to find the truth--for years, simply because I had been taught tithing my whole life, and because of the respect I had for the men of God who taught me about tithing. However, I eventually, did yield in prayer, and as I continued to do so my heart softened and became pliable. Then, I got to the point that I told God I would study His Word without any preconceived notions--even where tithing was concerned. Mind you, at that time, I was still pretty certain that I would find that it was correct. It didn't take long for me to see that first it didn't line up with grace. Second, what we call tithing is a far cry from the Old Testament command, where the poor didn't give the tithe--they received the tithe, along with the Levite. Third, the tithe was never meant to translate to a monetary system. And perhaps, most striking to me, there was no tithe in the Early Church, not until Roman Catholicism in the 2nd century A.D., instituted the practice--and at that time it was voluntary (later they made it the legality that it has become).
There are some other things that Roman Catholicism brought us that God never meant for us, too and for good reason--like the use of titles, which also came in 2nd century. Until then, everybody--including the church leaders were on first name basis.
What does all of this have to do with patience and tolerance? I'm confessing my faults, now. I have a hard time when I hear and see these things being forced on God's people as not only right, but His command and His law for us, because that is not true. The biggest issue I have is our unwillingness to consider that we might be wrong--and herein lies my problem. I don't have a right to be so harsh, impatient and intolerant with those who don't see it, or even with those who refuse to consider it; for one thing, several years ago, I was numbered among them, and but for the revelation and grace of God, "there go I". I can't forget that. If I do, then it's easy to become intolerant, and lose my compassion, and behave in that way toward those people who do not accept it. I don't have a hard time being compassionate and patient toward people in the world, those who have been rejected, the downtrodden, the hopeless, or the needy. I have a hard time being compassionate, patient and understanding toward those I think should know better, and I am dead wrong. I don't get to pick and choose the source of my compassion--it has to be extended without partiality and without respect of persons--if I'm going to teach it, I've got to live it.

Paul taught it best. Jesus taught it, too, but Paul had more time--so "greater (or more, not better) works". In Romans 14, Paul breaks it down by dealing with the cliques and classes that were occurring in his letter to the church at Rome. Apparently, they were becoming divided over issues of dietary differences and observances of the Sabbath. Many, of the new Christians were Jews, who were accustomed to the Old Testament Hebrew Laws and rituals. Paul calls them the "weak in faith" and instructs all to be respectful of the differences (of one another) and recognize that God has "received" all of us--whether we eat or not; or whether we tithe or not, or wear jewelry or not, slacks (women) or not, cover our heads or not. Get the picture. We will never agree on every point. But liberty's taken or not taken cannot become weapons, or sources of intolerance among us. We cannot use them to look down on a brother or sister in Christ who does not see things the way we see things--I'm talking to myself! However, not only to myself, because there are so many divisions among the Body (and there are to be none [Romans 12:25; 1 Corinthians 1:10-12] over "liberties", which are between God and the individual. We condemn and damn one another as if we must give account to man, but it is God to Whom we are accountable, alone. Therefore, "Then let us no more criticize and blame and pass judgment on one another, but rather decide and endeavor never to put a stumbling block or an obstacle or a hindrance in the way of a brother.

I know and am convinced (persuaded) as one in the Lord Jesus, that nothing is [forbidden as] essentially unclean (defiled and unholy in itself). But [none the less] it is unclean (defiled and unholy) to anyone who thinks it is unclean.

But if your brother is being pained or his feelings hurt or if he is being injured by what you eat, [then] you are no longer walking in love. [You have ceased to be living and conducting yourself by the standard of love toward him.] Do not let what you eat hurt or cause the ruin of one for whom Christ died!

Do not therefore let what seems good to you be considered an evil thing [by someone else]. [In other words, do not give occasion for others to criticize that which is justifiable for you.]

[After all] the kingdom of God is not a matter of [getting the] food and drink [one likes], but instead it is righteousness (that state which makes a person acceptable to God) and [heart] peace and joy in the Holy Spirit.

He who serves Christ in this way is acceptable and pleasing to God and is approved by men.

So let us then definitely aim for and eagerly pursue what makes for harmony and for mutual upbuilding (edification and development) of one another.

You must not, for the sake of food, undo and break down and destroy the work of God! Everything is indeed [ceremonially] clean and pure, but it is wrong for anyone to hurt the conscience of others or to make them fall by what he eats.

The right thing is to eat no meat or drink no wine [at all], or [do anything else] if it makes your brother stumble or hurts his conscience or offends or weakens him.  [Romans 14:13-21] 

The important thing for us to remember is that we must not be offensive and cause harm to one another no matter how we lean. Whether I "do", or whether I "don't". I have to consider the feelings of my brother or sister before I speak, and make sure that my words--and my actions are not offensive; and if they are, I must repent. 

In Luke 17, Jesus taught us how to be offended and not sin, and how as offenders to get it right when we offend.
Jesus told his disciples, “Situations that cause people to lose their faith are certain to arise. But how horrible it will be for the person who causes someone to lose his faith! It would be best for that person to be thrown into the sea with a large stone hung around his neck than for him to cause one of these little ones to lose his faith. So watch yourselves!

“If a believer sins, correct him. If he changes the way he thinks and acts, forgive him. Even if he wrongs you seven times in one day and comes back to you seven times and says that he is sorry, forgive him.” Then the apostles said to the Lord, “Give us more faith.”  [Luke 17:1-5] 

Offenders must ask for forgiveness; and those are offended, must forgive. The only way for each party to be free of the offense is for each party to do their part in the process. It isn't under the blood until that happens. If I forgive you, but you don't seek my forgiveness for the offense you committed against me, I am free, but you are not--until you repent (ask for my forgiveness [no copping out, and asking only God; it doesn't work that way. That isn't what Jesus said], and turn from the behavior). If I offend you, even if it is over and over, if I ask you a million times, sincerely to forgive me (and repent), if you do not, I am free, but you are not--and you will not be forgiven for your offenses and sins. Apparently, this was a bit of a hard saying, because the disciples response was, Lord, "Increase our faith". We do need faith, absolutely for these things. Forgiveness, and tolerance, patience and compassion--especially in the face of offense are difficult, but they are also taught under grace--and embodied in the New Commandment of LOVE. When we truly choose to love God with all of our heart, soul and mind--and our neighbors as ourselves, it won't always be easy, but it will be our goal, and we will want to do it. He will enable us to do it by the Holy Ghost, if we desire to love like He loves.
That's what we need faith for--not for money, houses and cars--you can get earthly things without spiritual faith. Spiritual things are for the spiritual, earthly for the earthly. God give me the grace and more abundant love to be understanding, patient and compassionate with those who don't see the things that you have revealed to me through Your Holy Word. If we never agree, keep me from judgmental, harsh attitudes, and when they are directed at me, give me the grace--and the faith to forgive.